Legacy of Faithfulness

Perhaps it's just having turned another year older, or maybe it has to do with the realization I can no longer operate from this "jar of clay" as easily as I used to. But lately, I've been thinking. In fact I've been thinking an awful lot about...my parents. Though no longer living, I'm finding they're filling many of my thoughts on a daily basis. Some days I catch glimpses of my mother in the reflection of a mirror. On other days, I surprise myself as I hear myself saying the same things to my children my parents said to me. And yet, as I navigate this thing called life and the roles I've been ascribed as a woman, wife, and mother, I can't help but think of the legacy my parents left behind. I can't help but notice how a part of who I am today is a result of whose I once was.

I have been told I resemble my mother and have curly hair like my father. In fact the root of my maiden name translated from Greek actually means "curly," and my dad's name, Eftihios, actually means "happy". So, for all intents and purposes, my dad's real name could have been "Happy Curly".  How's that for some needless personal trivia? It might provide you with a backdrop of where I've come from and what physical traits I've inherited. But, my outward appearance only partially reflects my heritage. It can only go so far in revealing who I am. People have often made the observation, "You look so much like your mother." And, I guess, maybe I do to some extent. Yet, when someone tells me they see something in me that reflects my mother's character, for me, it's one of the greatest compliments I could ever be given, knowing the kind of woman my mother was. Though our time together was a mere twenty-one years, most of what I learned about being a Godly woman, I learned by spending time with her, observing her interacting with others, and listening to her very few but timely and wisely chosen words. 

While we may inherit certain physical traits from our parents, our character development is also influenced to a great extent by our parents. We come to resemble those we've been around. Sometimes it's a choice, but sometimes it's by default. Understanding this, I cannot help but draw a connection as to how we also come to resemble our Heavenly Father. We get to "choose" to resemble Him. How? Well, once again, it's by spending time with Him, by knowing Him through His Word, and by regularly communicating with Him. In such a way, we will come to resemble Him more and more. To the degree we earnestly seek to know Him, we will be internally changed by Him. And then one day, we may be so blessed as to hear someone say to us, "You look so much like your Father." 

Mom and Dad, albeit some years ago

I used to spend time with my mom any time and in every place I could. I just wanted to be near her, with her, and around her. One particular conversation, I remember vividly. I recall following her into the bathroom. Yes, I said, into the bathroom. I used to love to watch her put on her makeup as she was preparing to go to work at our shop, Merle Norman Cosmetics. As I watched her that morning, I began tearing up as I said to her, "Mom, I’ll never be as beautiful, inside or out, as you are when I’m your age!"  I’ll never forget her response. She immediately stopped what she was doing, put her eyeliner down, turned to me as I sat on the vanity, grabbed my face and firmly said, "Maria, one day when you are my age (ironically forty-three, same age as I am now), you will not only be more beautiful, but better still, you will know more and be wiser in the Lord than I will ever be...and that's how it should be."  

Okay, needing a small pause for a tear or two...  

Some things I have forgotten. Some things I remember and clearly recall. Though I remember that scene, to be honest with you, I am absolutely certain I didn't believe a word she said to me. To this day, I'm sure if she were sitting right here, right now, I would likely say, "Mom, I'm not sure I am any bit the woman you were at forty-three, but I am working at it...I'm still...just a work in progress..." 

In recent years, I’ve discovered why I’ve always remembered that conversation. During a time when I was at my most selfish and not so willing to hear words of wisdom, God allowed me to retain critical pieces of my mother and father's wisdom for my future reference. Oh, how I've held onto them! I've referenced them, particularly as a parent, countless times. Many of those memories contain priceless treasures from the Word that have been a blessing to me throughout my adult life.

I now am blessed with a daughter of my own. Truly, she has been an answer to prayer. I prayed earnestly asking God to grant me a daughter so I might once again experience that special relationship between a mother and daughter. He gave me Sophia. She is maturing rapidly. And, as I look at her, I know I can say, will say and have already said the same to her. I have told her how much I desire her to far surpass me in her life. She is already so much wiser, so much more confident in who she is in Christ, and so much more mature than I ever was at the age of eleven. I have told her often how my heart’s desire is for her to go farther in understanding His Word, in seeking Him more, and in desiring Him before all and above all. I want so much more for her in this life, not so she can be happy, but rather so she can be much more for Him, a vessel wholly submitted to Him. Why would I want this for her? Simply, because I love her.  

Sophia

Shortly after I losing my mom, I remember sitting in my rusted-out '76 Chevy Malibu on the campus of Gordon College listening to my cassette tape of Steve Green's new release Find Us Faithful, while running my car battery way down. Just days before this song was released my mother had died. So as I listened to the lyrics, repeatedly, there in my car, I determined in my heart that just as my mother had left me an incredible legacy of a Godly life, I wanted to leave my children a heritage of faith just as rich, just as purposeful. I wanted these lyrics to be my anthem, my life's song:

We're pilgrims on the journey
Of the narrow road
And those who've gone before us line the way
Cheering on the faithful, encouraging the weary
Their lives a stirring testament to God's sustaining grace
Surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses
Let us run the race not only for the prize
But as those who've gone before us
Let us leave to those behind us
The heritage of faithfulness passed on through godly lives
Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful
May the fire of our devotion light their way
May the footprints that we leave
Lead them to believe
And the lives we live inspire them to obey
Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful
After all our hopes and dreams have come and gone
And our children sift through all we've left behind
May the clues that they discover and the memories they uncover
Become the light that leads them to the road we each must find
Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful 

I don’t know. It might just be me, but as I contemplate the meaning of a legacy, I feel there's so much more to it than what seems to be at the surface. People often refer to a legacy as the money or property left to heirs upon death. Yet, everyone, regardless of their material status in life, leaves behind a non-material legacy. It may be much harder to define, but it is often far more important. After we’ve said our final goodbyes, we will all leave behind some kind of enduring legacy whether we purposed to or not. THAT legacy will be comprised of a lifetime of relationships, accomplishments, beliefs, successes/failures, truths, and values. It will be reflected by where we invested most of our time, by what received most of our energy, and by who we loved and served through word and deed. And ultimately and most significantly, it will live on in the lives of those we’ve touched.

Regrettably, I don't know and never had the chance to ask my parents if they ever consciously set out to leave a particular legacy. But it doesn't much matter one way or the other. See, as I said earlier, we all leave a legacy, whether we have any intention of doing so or not. And I, for one, am thankful for the rich heritage of faith I have profited from. I am grateful for the stories of my parent's lives, stories that at times I know involved much pain and struggle, stories that are still being revealed as I continue filling in the details of their lives with the help of people who were impacted by them. They taught me by example that a legacy is rarely defined by the circumstances in life, but instead it is largely defined by how one chooses to respond to circumstances and how well one incorporates 
Phil. 2:1-4 into their life in a practical way:

1-4 "If you've gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care - then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don't push your way to the front; don't sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don't be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand."

(Translation - The Message)

Oh! May all who come behind ME find me faithful, not perfect, just faithful!